I just recently participated in two forum posts titled "So Not Better than You". The idea was to turn the "mommy wars" inside out. Laying it all on the table. How are you so not better than other moms? Do you let your laundry wait, dinner dishes sit, are your kids in front of the tv while you are on the computer? I found it funny though how one person's perspective of bad=another's perspective of good. Such as one person would say "I'm so not better than you because I let my child sleep in my bed and tend to their every cry" and another post would say "I'm so not better than you because I make my child sleep in his/her own bed and may cry for 5 minutes". Why is it that we have such different perspectives on good/bad parenting. If your child is happy/healthy and thriving isn't that what should matter? The "mommy wars" have been around forever and I don't see them going away anytime soon. Why do we have such a desire to be the "perfect" mom in everyone else's eyes when the only person we should be trying to be the "perfect" mom for is our own child? I'll admit I've compared before. I see other kids doing something that my child can't/doesn't do and I wonder why. I try and remember that adults are different, we all have our own individual strengths and weaknesses and so will children.
So every once in awhile a "I'm so not better than you" post can open your eyes. It's 12:00am here, my almost 4 month old is sleeping on me while I type, my 2yr old is on the couch naked (she hates clothes) watching Caillou, my 7 and 9 yr old are in bed but probably not asleep and my 12 yr old is on the other computer playing World of Warcraft (yep that's right we play video games...I'll hold for the gasping), the dinner dishes are half done, there are toys and the 2yr olds clothes on the floor and I'm pretty sure I have a load of clothes still in the washer. But guess what.... ITS OKAY. The kids don't have to get up early so they will get enough sleep, the mess will wait another day, my daughter's nakedness is only at home and even though she makes me freeze she is happy. They are all happy, they are all healthy, they are all loved unconditionally so I have no problem saying, I am SOOO not better than you.